Again I was listening to a song and an idea popped into my head my other being I'm and Angel with a Shotgun by The Cab to describe Narutos' and Sasukes' relationship. I just finished rereading The Outsiders (my favorite book of all time! It's the only book to ever make me cry.) and i was listening to How to Save a Life by The Fray, another amazing song, and i felt that it fits Dally's and Johnny's relationship so i wrote another short sonfic. There are no lyrics since FF COULD be sued for copyrighted lyrics but if you listen to the song and read it i think you would get a deeper reaction. Reviews are Appreciated and welcomed. If you have anything negative to say please say it politely and respectfully. I don't mind if you dislike my work but just tell me why in a nice way. Now to the reason your here.
You were the only one that would worship a piece of crap like me. You were the only one I couldn't stand see hurt.
You could never hurt a fly. You could never have taken a life even to defend yourself but to defend someone else you had to.
When you smiled you looked more like a kid but your smile was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. It was as bright as the sun.
It made me feel like there was still good in the world even though I knew better. There was no more good in the world, at least not for guys like me. I was too far gone already when I met you.
If your parents weren't drunkards and bitches but good and loving you weren't need a window to escape. The gang and the lot, you might not be where you are if you grew up in a family that you deserved.
Now that you're gone I can't stand this no good ugly world but I'm still here. Don't leave me Johnnycake! I beg you don't die!
Between you fucker drunkard of a father and uncaring bitch of a mother you grew up right, as right as you could in this neighborhood surrounded by all "wrong" people. Though the gang was alright.
You always wanted your familys' affections but could never have them and you, though you had the gang, you had ME, start to think life ain't worth the work. But Johnnycake your life was precious to ME and the gang. You were our glue. It was you who kept us together all these years.
If only I ran in there instead of you! Why couldn't I do the one thing that is important, right! Those kids shouldn't have been in there. Those damn kids it was their fault! No, that ain't right it was my fault your gone forever. I cry. You were the only thing I have ever loved!
As you walked the path of a Greaser you are forced to change. Become tough or you'll break, survive or you'll die, rely only on yourself or become dependent on one person, love only yourself 'cause there's no way to protect anyone but yourself, become hard or you'll be walked on. That is what a greaser needs to do in order to survive but you were different, Johnny, you were special.
I would have switched places with you in a heartbeat. If I could go back in
time I would be a hero and save you. I wished it was me that died instead of you. You were innocent and pure, something to be protected and nurtured. Haha. You would hate me for calling you that but it's true you and Ponyboy both but you more since Ponyboy has his brothers. I wish I was a better person then you wouldn't have died.
If I wasn't a coward, if I wasn't selfish, then you wouldn't have to have died. I should have rushed into that fire instead of you. I should be the one in pain till my death in the hospital. I'm not needed. My father doesn't need me and shoot the gang don't as hell need me. You might have idolized, I know some big words surprised aren't cha, me but you don't need me neither.
You were the gangs' pet. You might have been quite but you kept us together. No matter where you are now know this, I'm coming for you, though I might not be in the same place as you 'cause of your goodness and my badness.
You might not have gotten the best grades, and maybe you didn't quite get the things as fast as they could shoot them but you weren't stupid. I never thought of you stupid but risking your life for a bunch of no good runts you never met was stupid because your life is more important than ten of those shits.
You were the only thing I couldn't stop myself from loving. You got past my defensives like I had none. You were my Johnnycake.
Living in our world there was no chance you would ever be innocent but there's no way in hell your dirty like me or any Greaser, you're something special alright.
There's a lot wrong with your life. Starting with you parents and ending with me but there was nothing wrong with you. First your father a drunkard that beats you, second you have a no good mother who ignores your very existent, third living in the East Side, and fourth making me your role model. There ain't one thing good about me and you know that to still you look up to me. My rap sheet is about the size of New York City, I have no manners, the hell you think of me as a southern gentleman, bad mouth, bad attitude, bad everything so why? Why do you do that?
I couldn't take it anymore. A world without you ain't a world worth living in. I knew the cops couldn't tell if the heater was loaded or not but it wouldn't make a difference to them. They don't care if a jailbait like me died in the gutter and never to be found. As I stop under the lamp light I pray that I see you on the other side Johnny. Never much for church but if there is a God and there is a sliver of hope to see you again I would jump on it. As I turn and pull out my heater and was torn up by the bullets all I could think of was I'm coming Johnnycake it wouldn't be more than a moment I'll be there soon. I died gallantly like those southern gentleman you said reminder you of me right? I'm here Johnnycake.
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Category: Personal Finance